The Believers and the Secret Keepers
This is a writing to share what I did to
handle the time when my oldest son, who was then eight years old, first came to me with
a question in his eyes. He wanted to ask about Santa Claus. “Mom is there any such person as Santa
Claus? He is not real is he, Mom?” I had known this day would have to come soon,
but I still was not ready for it when yet.
Well it had to come, didn't
it? You cannot remain a child forever. When I found out it was at school. Another child said in a mocking voice, “You
still believe in Santa Claus? What a baby!” With this I acquired a knowledge that
would change the secular part of our Christmas celebrations forever. I remembered those
many years ago when I had gone to my mother heartbroken about my own popped
Santa-belief bubble. Now I was wondering how I could help Faruk understand
he needed to keep this new knowledge to himself. To spread it around prematurely
to a friend who believed would not be the right thing to do.
So, Faruk no longer believed. Would he miss the innocence that believing in
Santa Claus signifies? What would happen
if he told the “babies”? Well, I know it
would not have been the end of the world.
Still, I believed that hearing that they had been told something that
was not true at such a tender age would be hard for little ones to grasp. How could they deal with it when they were
too young to understand the intentioned loveliness of a legend which had been carried on by parents
for generation after generation. The story of Santa Claus was told for the joy
and enjoyment of children. It could be hard for a little one to understand that
he or she had been fooled his own parents!
Such young and tender minds would not have the tools to appreciate why
this had been done.
After momentary feelings of panic and
helplessness, an idea came to me. Even
after all these years I am still amazed at the cleverness of that idea. My idea shone as brightly as the Christmas
star that day. In fact, I thought it was rather brilliant.. I sat my beautiful boy down and told him my
story of the two groups into which people are divided at Christmas.
I don’t think it was me alone who chose
what was right for me to say that day.
Rather, I believe that Jesus spoke to my heart, so that I could answer
my child. After all, Jesus loves the
little children; He said they should be allowed to come to Him; and He told us
adults that unless we become like little children we cannot enter heaven. And, this was about how we celebrate the
remembrance of His birthday.
Here is the story I told my son. “Faruk, at Christmas
this world is made up of two groups, the ‘BELIEVERS’ and the ‘SECRET KEEPERS’.”
This is how this practice got started a
long time ago. There was a very holy man who lived in Holland who
had a unique
way of celebrating Jesus’ birthday. His
name was Saint Nicholas. After dark he
would go around his city and leave surprises in the shoes on all the doorsteps
. The presents were like birthday presents for Jesus, whose life was God’s most
special present to us. The difference was that we received the presents, not
Jesus. Children and their parents would look outside in the morning to find the
gifts and candies Nicholas had left.
After a long time Nicholas got very old and could no longer deliver his
presents. Parents had thought it was
such a lovely way to welcome the day of Jesus’ birth. So, they started to secretly leave presents
outside their own doors for their children.
Soon parents all over Europe were doing the same thing. When a lot of people start doing something, a
custom is created. In our country Saint
Nicholas became known as Santa Claus, and the custom is carried out to this
day.
Now there are two groups of people at
Christmas time.
One group listens for Santa’s bells and
sounds of reindeer hooves on the roof.
They leave out cookies and milk for Santa as a way of telling him “thank-you”
for what he has done. On Christmas
morning they wake up before the sun peeps over the trees and wake up their
parents. Together the family goes to
look under the tree to find what Santa has left there and to take down their
stockings that have “been hung by the chimney with care“.
I told Faruk, “This group is called the ‘BELIEVERS’!”
Then there is the other group. Most of the people in this group are
older. They are the adults, the
teenagers, and the older children. By
now my son’s eyes were like big dark brown saucers, and, looking into them, I
could tell that he already understood.
Still, I continued. I felt that
this was the most important story, well, after the nativity story, that is,
that I had ever told my child. I went
on, “Santa Claus is a legend, Faruk.
Believing in him makes mystery and excitement be a part of the presents
we receive as birthday presents for Jesus.
Eventually, we all grow up and realize that Santa Claus is just a
legend. That is when we join the new
group that is very important. When we
join this group we are getting closer to being adults.”
I told him, “This group is called the ‘SECRET KEEPERS’!”
I went on to share with him how important
his membership in “The Secret Keepers” group is. He now shared the responsibility that this
group had of carrying on the legend of Santa Claus. He was now expected to keep the secret for
Martin and Aleisha and the kids he knew who still believed. That was the rule for members of the “Secret
Keeper” group. I told him that one day he would be keeping the secret for his
own children.
Faruk was a great “Secret Keeper”.
Martin and Aleisha had the years of believing that they should. When Martin was ready to cross over Faruk and
I told him the story together. He was a
great “Secret Keeper”, too. Aleisha
eventually heard the story, but she was our family’s baby, and so she kept the
secret for her own little friends that still believed.
Telling that story to my own children seems
so long ago. Telling this to our family’s next generation seemed forever in the
future when I told them. My, how fast
time does fly! Faruk is now the father of two children who already
belong to the ‘secret keeper’ group. Martin does not have any children yet.
Aleisha is the mother of a seven year old who is still a member of the ‘believer’
group. Custom and tradition is passed onto the future.
Written by
Corinne Mustafa
December, 2004
Revised, 12/13
This is how this practice got started a
long time ago. There was a very holy man who lived in Holland who had a unique
way of celebrating Jesus’ birthday. His
name was Saint Nicholas. After dark he
would go around his city and leave surprises in the shoes on all the doorsteps
. The presents were like birthday presents for Jesus, whose life was God’s most
special present to us. The difference was that we received the presents, not
Jesus. Children and their parents would look outside in the morning to find the
gifts and candies Nicholas had left.
After a long time Nicholas got very old and could no longer deliver his
presents. Parents had thought it was
such a lovely way to welcome the day of Jesus’ birth. So, they started to secretly leave presents
outside their own doors for their children.
Soon parents all over Europe were doing the same thing. When a lot of people start doing something, a
custom is created. In our country Saint
Nicholas became known as Santa Claus, and the custom is carried out to this
day.
