This 'n That

Quotes for the week

A LITTLE BIT OF HUMOR

Sick Leave


I urgently needed a few days off work, but, I knew the Boss would not allow me to take leave. I thought that maybe if I acted 'Crazy' then he would tell me to take a few days off. So I hung upside-down on the ceiling and made funny noises.



My co-worker (who's blonde) asked me what I was doing. I told her that I was pretending to be a light bulb so that the Boss might think I was 'Crazy' and give me a few days off.



A few minutes later the Boss came into the office and asked, 'What in the WORLD are you doing?' I told him I was a light bulb. He said, 'You are clearly stressed out.' Go home and recuperate for a couple of days.'



I jumped down and walked out of the office...



When my co-worker (the blonde) followed me, the Boss asked her, '..And where do you think you're going?!'



(You're gonna lovethis....)



She said, 'I'm going home, too. I can't work in the dark.

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THESE REALLY WORK!!
AMAZINGLY SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES:


1. AVOID CUTTING YOURSELF WHEN SLICING VEGETABLES BY GETTING SOMEONE ELSE TO HOLD THE VEGETABLES WHILE YOU CHOP.


2. AVOID ARGUMENTS WITH THE FEMALES ABOUT LIFTING THE TOILET SEAT BY USING THE SINK.


3. FOR HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE SUFFERERS ~ SIMPLY CUT YOURSELF AND BLEED FOR A FEW MINUTES, THUS REDUCING THE PRESSURE ON YOUR VEINS. REMEMBER TO USE A TIMER.


4. A MOUSE TRAP PLACED ON TOP OF YOUR ALARM CLOCK WILL PREVENT YOU FROM ROLLING OVER AND GOING BACK TO SLEEP AFTER YOU HIT THE SNOOZE BUTTON.


5. IF YOU HAVE A BAD COUGH, TAKE A LARGE DOSE OF LAXATIVES. THEN YOU'LL BE AFRAID TO COUGH.


6. YOU ONLY NEED TWO TOOLS IN LIFE - WD-40 AND DUCT TAPE. IF IT DOESN'T MOVE AND SHOULD, USE THE WD-40. IF IT SHOULDN'T MOVE AND DOES, USE THE DUCT TAPE.


7. IF YOU CAN'T FIX IT WITH A HAMMER, YOU'VE GOT AN ELECTRICAL PROBLEM.


DAILY THOUGHT:
SOME PEOPLE ARE LIKE SLINKIES - NOT REALLY GOOD FOR ANYTHING BUT THEY BRING A SMILE TO YOUR FACE WHEN PUSHED DOWN THE STAIRS.



BOOK REVIEW

The Shack
by William P. Young

"Mack" Philips took his three children on a family camping trip while his wife visited her sister. Just as they were about to leave the campsite, the two older kids decided to take a last canoe ride before heading home. As their canoe overturned, and Mack went to help them, his back was turned and the unspeakable happened. Mack's youngest daughter,Missy, was abducted by a known child predator. After a massive search, evidence of Missy showed up at an abandoned cabin. Although they never found her body, everyone knew the worst had happened. For the next four years "a great sadness" fell over Mack and his family, until a note from God showed up in his mailbox. What happens next will move you to a greater understanding of God's unfailing love for us all.

I know that this is a book that was going around about three years ago. However, if you have never read this wonderful story you should do so. God is shown to be exactly...well almost exactly...as we are taught He would be and hope He would be.  "The Shack" is one of the most moving and profound books on the nature of God and our relationship with him that I have ever read.   It is so inspiring, so enlightening. If you want to know the meaning of the Father, Son and Holy Spirit in terms that we mere humans can understand - Read this!! It opened my eyes even more! I cannot recommend it enthusiastically enough and believe that the Lord may use it in incredible ways.

I even used The Shack as a Bible Study.

Author Bio

Wm. Paul Young was born a Canadian and raised among a Stone Age tribe by his missionary parents in the highlands of former New Guinea. He suffered great loss as a child and young adult and now enjoys the "wastefulness of grace" with his family in the Pacific Northwest.

Household Hints

For the Bedroom

* Shoe boxes stored on high shelves are easier to take down if a small finger hole is cut in the front of each box near the bottom.

* Wire coat hangers can easily hold skirts or pants if you use clip-type clothespins along the bottom of the hanger. Very simple for children to use.

* To help children distinguish between their own clothing and that of other children in the family, color-code all hangers with colored tape and assign each child a color. For socks, T-shirts, and underwear, a stitch or two of thread of the same color will do the trick. (Helps you as you sort the laundry, too.)


* To save time making beds, stitch the bottom corners of your bedspread together like a contour sheet, so it fits the mattress. This saves running from one side of the bed to the other to straighten the spread.


* To eliminate opening sheets to see their size, buy each size in a different color.


Shared by Corinne Mustafa